Revise the Following Poorly Written Opening of a Claim Letter

question 17

Essay

Revise the following poorly written opening of a claim letter requesting a refund
of the full purchase price of an iPod still under warranty. Write the opening
sentence only.
On May 12 I purchased an iPod touch from your online store for $229.99 plus shipping charges of $15.24. I have been using this iPod during my daily commute to work ever since I bought it. Yesterday it simply quit working, and now I can't upload any songs or playback any songs previously recorded. This iPod cost me a pretty chunk of change for a little music during the commute, and I'm pretty angry about it failing so soon. When I tried to return it to a local outlet for your company yesterday, they told me I had to write directly to you. Now what?

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Definitions:

Unsolicited Proposals

Proposals submitted to an organization without a formal request, typically to offer solutions or services the proposer believes the recipient may need.

Solicited Proposals

Proposals that are requested by an organization or individual, often through a formal process.

Internal Proposal

A document or presentation aimed at persuading internal stakeholders or management to approve a project, budget, or initiative.

Management Support

The backing and assistance provided by management to help in the implementation of strategies, projects, or initiatives.